As much as we love the phrase, “you got this”, when you’re hurtling towards some unbelievably cruel deadline that until about five minutes ago didn’t exist, it doesn’t always cut the mustard. Whenever life throws us obstacles – and boy can it really dish ’em out – it’s how we deal with them that define the outcome. Your confidence and self-belief will be the key denominators to whether you make it through or not, and because Triumph knows support and confidence-boosting like no other (case in point), together we’ve gathered five mantras you can use to kick your confidence into another level and build your resilience with each passing day.
“Easy as ABC”
This little mantra is designed to remind you of cognitive behavioural therapist co-founder Albert Ellis’ the ABC method. This way of thinking allows you to chart the ‘Adversity’, subsequent ‘Belief’ and the ‘Consequence’ of that belief, so as to be more aware of a rational reaction to happenings around you. For example, you might not land yourself an investor after that pitch meeting – that’s your adversity. But instead of your belief being, ‘I’m terrible, I’ll never make it’, and the ‘consequence’ of that being you lose confidence in your idea and give it up completely, consider how your belief can change and what that means for the outcome. If, instead, your belief is that you might not have been well-prepared, your consequence could be: ‘I need to work on finessing my delivery.’ And that changes the whole scenario.
“I can learn from this”
It doesn’t help in scenarios where your shoe gets stuck in a footpath crack, but this mantra has a way of turning a ‘mistake’ into an opportunity for a lesson. The lesson might not present itself right now (and that’s fine), but it’s a gentle reminder that there will be something to learn out of this moment and you’ll be all the better for it, especially if it means accepting that you’re wrong.
“If you really want to rediscover wonder,” said ‘wrongologist’ Kathryn Schultz, “you need to step outside of that tiny, terrified space of rightness and look around at each other and look out at the vastness and complexity and mystery of the universe and be able to say, ‘Wow, I don’t know. Maybe I’m wrong.’”
“Remember that time you…”
A good way to build your resilience and confidence is to remind yourself of the times you achieved something great. “Before we even show up at the doorstep of an opportunity,” wrote Amy Cuddy, in Presence, “we are teeming with dread and anxiety, borrowing trouble from a future that hasn’t yet unfolded. Don’t think you can manage what’s waiting for you to manage?” This mantra will remind you to have a look at your past successes – let them be the judge.
“Who needs comfort zones, anyway?”
The best way to develop your resilience is to get out there and test it. “Breaking your own mould can only make you stronger and more confident to reach higher levels in your professional and personal life,” offers Dr Elizabeth Lombardo, author of Better Than Perfect. “Doing something that challenges you gives you a whole different outlook and makes you more receptive to change.”
“Change is as good as a holiday”
On that note, no matter how you feel about change, it’s an inevitability. All your efforts to keep your work and life the same will soon come to zilch; the only constant is change. Because of this, you’ve got to be able to reframe change as a positive. Even if you’re not certain what this sudden shift will lead to, there are endless possibilities coming your way – this mantra reminds you it’s your job to make the most of them.